God Has Better Plans

When your kid doesn’t get that award…..but God has better plans

A guest post by Jen

This past Monday was the first grade awards ceremony (Josh is in first grade).  I knew Josh wasn’t getting an award.  He’s done so well in school but in first grade it awards are given at the discretion of the teacher.  So, I didn’t show up.  I remember feeling bad for him that he didn’t receive an award.  I emailed Mike about it who reassured me that Josh probably didn’t care that much.

At Tuesday morning breakfast, I was mentioning to Shaina how I might be late for her 4th grade award ceremony.  Instantly, Josh looked me with the “sad orphanage look”…see picture.  I’ve only seen this sad look come out a couple of times since we’ve had him for the last 5yrs.  With his sad look, he asked me why I didn’t come to his awards ceremony the day before. I explained that since he didn’t receive an award, I didn’t come.

Joshy Sad Face

Back in the orphanage on the day he was leaving, Joshy could tell something was up. It’s a heartbreaking photo but one of our favorites.

Then Mike asked if he was upset about not getting an award or that mom didn’t show up. At this point Josh had run to me and was burying his head in my lap.   He said he was upset that I didn’t show up.  This may seem odd, but since Josh is adopted these were really encouraging words to me.  This showed me that Josh has bonded to me.  When you see us, you may think its obvious that Josh is our kid.  But sometimes I feel like he easily doesn’t care where I am (i’m always the one trying to find him in a crowd and he doesn’t cry when he’s lost us). I have often wondered if this is a bonding issue.

Tonight I took Josh out to his favorite restaurant (McDonalds) for ice cream.  Mike and I made him a new award.  I was glad that I had the opportunity to encourage him as a student.  He’s been doing so well and we really felt like he deserved one.  I also asked him more about the awards ceremony.  He said that there were so many people there, he couldn’t find me.  In addition, he was holding in the tears because he couldn’t find me.  Josh is a pretty confident kid.  He’s not too shy, very confident and wanders away from me. This was unlike him to respond so emotionally.

While I love being a mom to our 2 biological girls, being a mom of an adopted kid has been special too (to keep things in perspective, there have been lots of trials too…that’s a whole different blog post!). Thru adoption, I’ve learned more about the Lord’s unconditional love for us.  I am so grateful to God for bringing Josh into our family and for the many confirmations we have received along the way – even unexpected ones like the award ceremony.

We think adoption is amazing.  If you have any questions about it, we would love to talk with you.  Please leave a comment or email us directly.


About Mike Berk

A father of three, husband of one, worshiper of God - one blessed man.
Adoption, Christian Living, Contentment, theology ,

2 responses to God Has Better Plans

  1. Pingback: A peak into our lives | Mike and Jen Berk

  2. Pingback: On Ice Cream, Immigration and Road kill | Mike and Jen Berk

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